It will come as no surprise to you, Bertha, that I like submissive men. But I think it might only be certain types of submissive men, who do certain things, in a certain way. I'm very specific, apparently, when it comes to stuff what I like.
For example, I like the idea of nerdy, dorkish Gabriel Gray, stumbling through sex like a blind man in a nunnery. I like the idea of his brain being all: oh God no I don't masturbate not ever ever IT'S A SIN! SEX IS DIRTY! OH ALL RIGHT THEN.
A bit like in this tremendously orsum fic, from amazingly talented erotic fanfiction writer, Perdiccas:
I like the idea of a really hot, manly dude, like...say...Alex O'Loughlin's character in The Shield, being all sexually flexible and up for anything and oh, you want me to crawl around on all fours while you paddle my ass with that ping pong bat? OH ALL RIGHT THEN.
But I don't like this:
Because it just makes me laugh, rather than doing what it's probably supposed to do. As some sort of half-assed kinker for femdom, I should really like this picture. Right? But I don't, because he looks stupid and he's crying way too much and he's not in any kind of sexy position.
Where as this, on the other hand:
Yeah, I like that. He's big and hunky, he's wearing a business suit, and he looks really pouty about the whole thing. But in a good way. Plus I think I like it because it's almost believable, you know? Like something you could just end up doing, almost by accident. Oh, is that some rope, lying around?
Take it, moody business bitch.
And then there's this:
Which makes me go: unf.
But this totally doesn't:
But just to be clear: if you like men in cages, I'm not mocking you. More power to you. Get down with your bad self. I just can't get into it, without laughing. Unless it's Sylar in a cage, rattling the bars. Then I'd totally poke a banana in, for him to eat.
P.S. If you would like to see more pictures like this, find them at this totally orsum site:
Some of them are beautiful, some of them are LOL, all of them are NSFW.