Yeah, I know I missed Mancandy Monday. I know it was meant to be Clive! But won't it be worth waiting for, Bertha, when I shove him out into the world next Monday?
So anyway, updates. Or: how Charlotte lets tiny things get to her and allows a cloud of dread to then form.
I've now written 62000 words for Things. Not a bad tally, and I'm finally starting to be happy with the ideas I'm coming up with and the stories I'm producing. In between I've done an actual chapter by chapter synopsis for the thing I'm hoping to submit to BL, but now I'm not so happy with the thing itself. Needs less humour, and more sex at the start, I feel.
I've had two stories accepted for BL's upcoming anthologies, too, as you may be able to see by the sidebar. Flexible (in Misbehaviour), a story about a man who kind of...teases a woman with his ambiguous sexuality, and Slut (in Sexy Little Numbers), which is about a guy who gets that label, rather than the girl. Really pleased with this, and with Adam's comments on Slut (which made me cry, just about), because I've been so worried about the way I am and the things I like to write about.
I'll probably never be popular. I don't write about the same things Lora Leigh does. But I'm still doing okay and that's so gratifying.
Even though my submission to Xcite books got the smack down. Which I feel okay about, because as the lovely Ella Regina reminded me- I do have my own book! It's so incredible that I have my own anthology, that the idea actually keeps falling out of my head. I'm a div.
Am also a div for letting this feeling of dread surround me. As soon as I get one bit of "bad" news, I always imagine that it's all downhill from here- in every aspect of my life. And sure enough, later on another bit of bad news turned up. So now I'm just waiting for my college to close and my foot to drop off and Black Lace to go bust (oh Jesus, touch that wood) and Clive Owen to be in a hideously disfiguring accident that smoothes out all of his crag and turns him into Brad Pitt.
Note to self: get a hold of self.
But enough about me. How are you?
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You're a good egg, Charlotte. I don't know if it helps but you're not the only one who spends time in Dreadville. I'm a permanent fixture there and I'd bet I'm not the only one. If you lived closer I would buy you a glass of something to cheer you up.
ReplyDeleteYep, 'cloud of dread' sums it up perfectly (which is typical of you because you're a fantastic writer). About an hour of 'Wahey!Yesss!Win!Airpunch!' followed by endless 'but what I'm doing now is rubbish compared to that/everyone wants x,y,z when I can only write a,b,c/I've lost it (if I ever had it) and this is my last sale' type brooding. Plus a goodly measure of 'nobody is going to buy books this year and all the publishers will fold'. Helpful thought processes are not my friend either.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying very hard to wean myself off (a) second guessing what people like/want, rather than writing about what I like/want (b) manically obsessing over things I've submitted and clicking the same links 80 times a day.
It's very difficult though.
Anyway, I wanted to say that I read 'Not Knowing It' last night and loved, loved, loved it. Not only did those ice-cream flavours make my mouth water (do they exist?can I buy them?) but the whole story was a treat. You have that thing where you can say a LOT in about three words. I love that. You rule. Cheer up!
Hey... I found you! Please send me an e-mail, sounds like we must get in touch properly ;)
ReplyDeleteAw, you guys! You don't know how much seeing your comments has cheered me up, seriously. I know I'm not the only one, but it's nice to know that and talk to like minded Dreadsville people. *clinks glass with Ella*
ReplyDeleteAnd Justine- HOW did you see inside my brain like that? Hee! The Amazing Justine. See her unscramble your brain! Watch her guess your every thought process!
Plus that clicking 80 times a day. I have back ache from being at the computer so long, clicking the same things over and over like a crazy obsessive. But you've caught me red-handed, chief, and I'll back away from the keyboard. Bad, crazy Charlotte!
And thanks for saying that about Not Knowing It. The ice-creams don't exist as far as I know, but oh, I enjoyed making them up. Basically I just smudged together words that I like eating. YAM!
Oh, and Lucy- I've sent an email to your 1985 creative writer email address. I don't know if this is the one you use, but hopefully it will get through. If not, and you don't see this, I'll try PMing you my email through Myspace. Thanks for visiting! And for being a peach.
*hugs lovely writing people*
Charlotte! I think every single writer goes through the same dread you do. I'm sitting here nodding in agreement because my story didn't make it into Misbehaviour. Pout. Despite having stories in Seduction, Liaisons and Sexy Little Numbers, I'm feeling that same feeling of dread because of Misbehaviour.
ReplyDeletePlus, can I just say I am positively *green* with envy that you have your very own BL anthology coming out. That's just awesome. Seriously.
Don't worry about Misbehaviour, Kristina! From what I heard he had a *really* hard time deciding on stories for that one, so I'm sure it must have been tough for him to say no to you. He obviously loves your work, or he wouldn't have said yes to the other three! Plus SLN is the big one, right? You get down with your big story writing self.
ReplyDeleteAs to the envy thing- it is awesome that I've got my own collection. I know it is. But I've also just counted all the stories you've had published. I stopped and got dizzy after thirty. Thirty! Two novellas/novels, too. And through so many different editors!
At the moment, Adam likes me. Doesn't mean anyone else will.
You have nothing to be envious of. Your stories are wonderful.
There's probably a mental illness called Writers' Pessimism (or maybe it's Writers' Manic-Depression): the one where no matter how well we're doing we're always convinced that we suck from this moment on. Because, yes, we're pretty much ALL like that, Charlotte.
ReplyDeleteJust gotta learn to live with it.
:-)
P.S. Your stories are great and I'm so pleased we're in SLN and Misbehaviour together!
Thanks, Janine! You're right about Writer's Pessimism. I'm trying to live with it!
ReplyDelete*You're* pleased that we're in SLN and Misbehaviour together? I love getting the proofs just so that I can read your stories a bit early!